http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2009/11/half-lifetime.html

The editor at CBS Sunday Morning asked if I had any photos of my son Mike back at the period when I first had the idea for The Graveyard Book - late 1985. I looked. We really didn't have any. I wandered next door and asked Mary (his mum, my former wife and for these last five years my friend and next-door neighbour) if she had any photos from back then. "No," she said. Then, "Do you mean those transparencies? I have them in an envelope somewhere." She vanished and came back with a large manila envelope from a long time ago. "Here."

Half a lifetime ago -- literally -- I was nearly 25, and working for magazines. Henry Fikret, who photographed a lot of the interviews I did, volunteered to take some photos of me and my family, and he did.A week later the envelope arrived, and I realised that everything he shot was on colour transparencies -- like huge slides -- and I was never sure what do with them, other than being fairly sure I couldn't take them down to Boots the Chemist and have prints knocked out. So they stayed in their envelope, and they kept their secrets, and were forgotten.

Yesterday I had the transparencies scanned, and finally got to see lots of pictures I had never actually seen before of Holly as a baby, Mike at the time that I would have watched him riding his tricycle around the graveyard, and me... at exactly half my age: A young journalist who had sold a very small handful of short stories and two non-fiction books, with dreams of writing fiction and comics. At the time I was dressing in grey, but was getting tired of the way that you would buy something grey and take it home and discover that it was a blueish grey or a brownish grey, and wondering if I'd have the same problem if I just started to dress in black.

And half a lifetime on, it seemed like it might be good to put one up here. I checked, and Mary didn't mind. What odd clothes we wore back then. What big glasses. And look, my hair is practically normal.





So long ago, and it went like the blink of an eye.

victortenzin and I made a pizza the other day and I tried something a little odd. I was inspire by a sauce option they had at Papa Murphys briefly called something like Sweet Hawaiian (?).

For the sauce I diced up two tomatoes, put in about a tablespoon of spring roll sauce (a very sweet sauce you can get at Asian supermarkets), a tablespoon of finely chopped purple onion, about half a clove of garlic, and about a teaspoon of barbecue sauce. Then I cooked it for a while in the microwave. The result was a sweeet, tangy, oniony red sauce. We topped the pizza with cheese, mushrooms, bacon, pineapple and more onion. It turned out, in my opinion, pretty good. The sweetness of the sauce and the pineapple worked well with the saltiness of the cheese and bacon.

*nod*

she makes it work.

It's weird cause I've kinda been thinking about it for a few days.

It's weird because some where I'll always kinda be waiting. It's like a little itch in the back of your throat that just won't go away. You can ignore it and do other things but it's still there and eventually your attention gets turned back to it. And this may as well go on for the rest of my life. At any point in time it may or may not happen. I don't know.. it's out of my control. I guess it's sorta like anything else in life but yet some how it seems more than that.

And even if I sit here and go over what might happen and what would I do if it did happen..
it doesn't change the fact that I'll still be here.. waiting.. wondering...and I'm not really sure if I am hoping or not any more.

I've seen commercials for Gardasil, which is the HPV vaccine, to be given to young women to help prevent cervical cancer. HPV is a virus, some strains of which can cause cervical cancer. What I just found out is that HPV is implicated in many cases of mouth and throat cancer in men, and so it would seem to be a good idea to inoculate men with Gardasil as well. Yet the CDC recently decided not to recommend the routine use of this on young men.

The point is that those of us who are parents of boys may have to be proactive and decide whether we want to ask doctors to give them this vaccine.

Source: http://contexts.org/socimages/2009/11/09/guest-post-oral-sex-vaccines-other-dangerous-pursuits/

Here's what I have been doing/feeling/thinking between yesterday at 4 p.m. and today at 4 p.m. Time is on a 24 hour clock, so 13:00 is 1:00 p.m., 16:00 is 4:00 p.m. etc.

• 12:53 But WHY would it be bad to eat 3/4 of a loaf of Hawaiian Sweet Bread? #

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http://journal.neilgaiman.com/2009/11/for-those-who-read-this-blog-for.html

(Serena Altschul and some author in July, sitting on the trampoline after two days of interviews. None of which, oddly enough, were done on the trampoline.)

Mr. Neil,

I DVR'd yesterday's installment of Sunday Morning and after zipping through it back and forth multiple times cannot seem to find you, though the description indicated the correct episode. Was it bumped to next week? Have you been sucked into an alternate Neil-less universe?

A concerned reader,
Mary

I'm afraid it was bumped by the Fort Hood Massacre.

I checked: The profile CBS did of me is apparently still going out, probably some time in December, although no-one seems certain when. I was told that we could help ensure that it is broadcast (and possibly make it come out sooner than December) if CBS think people would actually like to see it. Which means that if you do want to see it, you can help the process along if you write or email CBS and (politely) tell them so:

ADDRESS:
CBS News Sunday Morning
Box O (for Osgood)
524 West 57th St.
New York, NY 10019

E-MAIL: sundays@cbsnews.com

...
Dear Neil Gaiman, I ask for half-a-moment of your time (I would not presume to ask for more). This Spring 2010 I am teaching a Topics in Literature class on YOU at Winona State University (Eng 225: Neil Gaiman). Easy enough to select representative novel (American Gods), short stories (Fragile Things), children and YA (Graveyard Book), but here's the rub: I will likely only assign one Sandman graphic novel to students. I have been debating which is most representative, most worthy of inclusion, most amenable to class discussion and student scholarship. Then I thought I'd ask you. I know you suggest above that, for questions of this sort, we consider you a dead author, but I know you're not. When I came to a similar impasse about which of Ursula Le Guin's works to include in another class, she actually replied and offered her input. I extend the same offer to you: which of the Sandman volumes would you like to see on the syllabus?
Thank you for your time,
Nicholas Ozment, English Instructor
WSU

It's a hard one. I think if I were teaching I'd either go for Season of Mists or Fables and Reflections, because both of them have stuff to teach -- those nice chewy bits that people can like or dislike, argue with or discuss. I know a lot of teachers like to teach Dream Country because a) Midsummer Night's Dream won awards, and b) it's short and c) it has a script in the back. Your call. And good luck.

...

I mentioned recently that there were some beautiful new Polish and Russian book covers for my books that I'd seen at signings, which got me thinking. The International Cover gallery on this website is incredibly out of date.

It's at http://www.neilgaiman.com/p/Works/Books/International_Covers.

And though I get a lot of foreign editions in, and will at some point head down to the basement and rummage around and scan some (this week's mail brought the two-volume Japanese edition of Anansi Boys, on the cover of which Fat Charlie is not only Very White, but also Very Thin, and the complex Chinese - ie. Taiwan and Hong Kong - edition of The Graveyard Book) I thought that blog readers, being, as you are, all over the world, might be a better resource for knowing where to look for foreign covers.

Was your basement finished when you purchased your home or did you have it finished for your basement library? If you finished it yourself, how difficult was it? Also, I thought I saw a dehumidifier in one of the Photosynth pictures. Do you need one because of the books?

I'm asking because we have a full unfinished basement that we would like to have finished. We are running out of room for our books also. I don't think we don't have as many as you do though. :)

Any other suggestions for such a project would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks,
C.

No, when we got here the basement had a clay floor that puddled when it rained. We hired some nice builders and spent a lot of money finishing it, putting in drainage tiles, underfloor heating and all. There's a dehumidifier there in the summer and a humidifier in the winter, because after the first few years I noticed that binding glue and leather book covers were both cracking and flaking. There's now the equivalent of a large house in basement rooms beneath this house, filled with books and CDs and suchlike stuff.

And finally, a few photos from the China trip, taken by Ian Ford (or in one case, on his camera). Ian's a travel guide who now lives in China who helped organise my travels, and came along with me for part of the journey.

Amanda and I in the silk clothes that my publisher had given us as a thank you for coming, and because they are terrific.

I'm holding the Galaxy Award for this year, given to the foreign author most popular with Chinese reader-voters. This was my second year of winning it, so I have retired from the competition and said that they have to find a new favourite foreign author now.

I'm not sure if I can afford or will go to any of these, but others of you might be interested.

Monday, December 7th
Passion Pit / Hockey
Crystal Ballroom
$17.50 in advance, $20 door Ticketmaster
Doors at 7pm, Show at 8pm
 
Tuesday, December 8th
Metric / Band of Skulls
Crystal Ballroom
$17.50 in advance, $20 door Ticketmaster
Doors at 7pm, Show at 8pm
 
Wednesday, December 9th
The Bravery / Airborne Toxic Event
Crystal Ballroom
$9.47 Ticketmaster
Doors at 7pm, Show at 8pm
 
 Thursday, December 10th
Vampire Weekend / White Rabbits
Crystal Ballroom
$25 Ticketmaster
Doors at 7pm, show at 8pm
 
 Friday, December 11th
Spoon / Black Joe Lewis
Crystal Ballroom
$25 Ticketmaster
Doors at 7pm, show at 8pm


I think more than any of these, I wish I was going to Dropkick Murphys tonight. I feel the need to drink copious amounts of dark beer and break some skulls.

@ Star Wars Episode III

Obi-Wan just asked Yoda not to send him against Anakin because he wouldn't be able to kill him. And yet, he IS able to chop off his arms and legs and then watch as the nearby lava sets him on fire and then just walk away. Really. At that point killing Anakin might actually have been the nicer option?

There is a wonderful moment when the Vader mask goes on, and James Earl Jones takes over the voice… For just a split second the magic is there, and nearly all is forgiven. Unfortunately the next moment is pissed on when the first moments of Lord vader are all whiney teenager/Frankensteins monster impression…

I am not sure wahts more annoying that George Lucas had to make the prequels, or that the internal inconsistancies were so keenly felt. Or that I paid to watch these damn things at the cinema… As Obi Wan once said. Whose the more foolish. The fool or the fool that follows him. Dammit george Lucas, you warned us off back in 1977!!!

@ The Wizard of Oz.

My mum suggested that 'Ruby Slippers' should be sold in shops and would be a top seller. My knowledge of the counter culture appropriation of Dorothy as a Gay Icon thinks that these might see even stronger sales if produced in mens sizes...

@ Octopussy.

They really gave up trying for cunningly saucy names in Bond here didn't they, and just went for Octopus but changed the last bit to 'pussy'. WTF, did they hand a creative meeting over to Beavis and Butthead or something?

And the reason is that it was her Dads nickname for his little girl. That makes it even more gross! I mean ewwwwwww!

Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
(I couldn't think of a better subtitle, so I went for the nerdy.)


1. Communicate your hurt as soon as you feel possible, without being detrimental to yourself. Do so in the most respectful manner you can. Use "I" statements, like "I feel", instead of "You did this." Being hurt and being level-headed do not necessarily equate in many situations, so if needed be willing to give yourself time before the discussion. Ask yourself, "Did they mean to do this?" and respond appropriately. Most people hurt others out of ignorance, not malicious intent.

2. Realize that what you're feeling may not be entirely hinged on the other person's actions. Take time to think about it: was something else brought up, something that isn't really related to what took place but in fact was triggered by it? Own your reactions and the place that they come from. Be honest with the person who hurt you, and tell them if this is the case. In the thick of things it is exceptionally difficult to judge where our emotions are actually originating, and it's easy to pin everything on the person who hurt you regardless of whether they truly deserve it. Emotions may continue to unfold and unfold some more, and your feelings of pain may touch on things you never expected.

3. If the other party feels real remorse, they will make strides to try to correct it. Accept those actions and try to let go of the hurt feelings. It takes a long time to rebuild trust depending on the depth of the wound, but usually relationships are salvageable. After all, this person is in your life because on some level you connected well. But, if the other party does not make strides to correct it... be true to yourself, and ask if the hurt is something you're willing to live with; you have to determine if the answer to that question is "no". If you are feeling disrespected and unheard, you have the right to walk away from the situation. But be willing to look past your own pain if the other person sincerely apologizes and changes their behavior.


And the should-be-unspoken-but-often-needs-to-be-said addendum to THIS particular set of rules is, "Don't use your feelings of hurt to try to hurt them in return." It's not a pissing match, it's a relationship.


Your pain is not something that anyone but you can feel. You have the right to be acknowledged and held in regard, but you also have the responsibility to communicate and be self-aware. No situation is one-sided. There are no victims or bad guys (unless you truly ARE the victim of abuse, then you should ponder Point #3) but hurt feelings are usually the result of lack-of-information and misunderstandings. It's not easy to look past the sadness, confusion, hurt, anger, and feelings of disregard because those are what's REAL to us. Those are completely and utterly valid feelings, but ask yourself if they are in proportion to the situation.

None of this is instinctual or easy; to say so would be a flat-out lie. Being hurt is a terrible, visceral thing that none of us would wish on ourselves or our friends. It's completely against the nature of being hurt to view it logically, but you owe it to yourself and the health of your relationships to do the best you can, just as the other person owes it to themselves and the situation to do so as well. Take time, be true to your emotional reality, and be willing to forgive when presented with remorse and reparations.

Also, be utterly and totally prepared to offer apologies of your own.


This post brought to you by the fact that, even though I try to live these principles in my life, quite often I fuck up and sometimes I really need to be reminded of them. I think we all do.

Of course, the "easy" part of the title is a lie.

1. Acknowledge there is a problem. Understand that even if you do not believe that something you did or said was hurtful, the other person does. To disregard this feeling is to disregard the other person entirely. If you are confused about what was hurtful, ask. Any reasonable person will tell you. Accept what you're told, regardless of whether you think the hurt -itself- is reasonable or not. We all have baggage, cloudy pasts and triggers. Respect them and the feelings they produce.

2. Take ownership of the part you played. Saying, "I don't know what I did wrong" or "I didn't do anything wrong" doesn't help fix the core issue. It's not a matter of wrong or right, it's a matter of learning about ourselves and the people we interact with. Feel free to explain your side of the issues, but avoid the above excuses; they shut down all hopes of further communication by, again, disregarding the other person's feelings.

3. Change the offending behavior. Some might call this "making amends" but to me that sounds like something you do just to get the other person off your back. Instead, internalize. If you do not feel that you can change the behavior, then recognize that the other person will often continue to be hurt by it and then be prepared for eventual consequences in your relationship with that person. Don't expect them to "just get over it." See Point 1 RE: disregarding someone else's feelings. And perhaps most important, Change the behavior because you value the other person.


And, I guess, an addendum to all of the above is... do not make an apology simply because you think it's "a thing you have to do". Perhaps that -should- be an unspoken rule, but quite often, sadly, it needs saying.


Saying "I'm sorry" means nothing without the actions to back it up. Saying "I'm sorry" and continuing the hurtful behavior is akin to saying, "I'm sorry that you feel that way, but fuck you. Deal with it." That's not being sorry, that's being abusive. If you genuinely think that you should -not- be sorry... you still should. Being aware of how our behavior affects the others around us is, in my opinion (and of course, this whole thing is just my opinion) the heart of our humanity: Empathy.

If you're in a situation where someone is hurt (and we will assume that they're not being "hurt" to exert some sort of control over you, but they are being true and genuine) then take a step back and ask, "What would -I- like to have happen if -I- was the one feeling hurt?" Then, do those things.


This post brought to you by the guy who used to beat the living shit out of me and then an hour later come into my room crying, saying he "was sorry and that he would never do it again"... then a day later beat the living shit out of me. Actions always speak louder than words.

Here's what I have been doing/feeling/thinking between yesterday at 4 p.m. and today at 4 p.m. Time is on a 24 hour clock, so 13:00 is 1:00 p.m., 16:00 is 4:00 p.m. etc.

• 09:26 Are we having earthquakes or is my neighbor having a tantrum? #

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i admit it, i would bet the farm that best practices were not in place during the filming of the movie. i would also bet the farm that animals were hurt if not killed.

just because there's no "proof" doesn't mean it ain't so. which is why i hide dvds of the movie at target. =\ it's my little "fuck you" to all parties involved.

When the film was first released, several Australian animal rights organizations raised allegations of animal cruelty during filming and called for a boycott. The Sunday Mail reported at the time that Animal Liberation Queensland founder Jacqui Kent alleged the killing of more than 20 kittens during production and added that she was disturbed by reports from Europe which alleged other animals had been injured, as in one case where a producer allegedly had broken a cat's paw to make it appear unsteady on its feet. Kent said her organization had a number of complaints from people who had seen the film and were concerned that it could not have been made without cruelty.[1] The Tasmanian and Victorian branches of the RSPCA also alleged abuses.[2]
The film was reported to have the approval of the American Humane Society, despite not having their officers present during filming.[1]
The American Humane Association attempted to investigate cruelty rumors through "contacts in Europe who normally have information on movies throughout the world." While noting that the contacts had also heard the allegations, they were unable to verify them. The organization also reported, "we have tried through humane people in Japan, and through another Japanese producers to determine if these rumors are true but everything has led to a dead end."[3]

Here's what I have been doing/feeling/thinking between yesterday at 4 p.m. and today at 4 p.m. Time is on a 24 hour clock, so 13:00 is 1:00 p.m., 16:00 is 4:00 p.m. etc.

• 09:08 feeling srprisingly motivated & positive 2day, esp. for one who thought she overslept, got off 2 false start, & had to start over again #

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I'm still sleeping a bit over the recommended amount of sleep a day but the coughing is way less and I am eating!

I'm sure I'll go back to home in a few days, home being my apt. Before you know it's gonna be Thanksgiving and my mom is gonna be here.

My grandma's caretaker person seems to have made it a personal mission to get our family back into communication or something and some how managed to get us to agree to go to Thanksgiving dinner at my grandparents house. This is gonna be one weird holiday. I know my mom will be there and probably ben and laura.. but then comes the weirdness..my dad is suppose to go..WEIRD.. I think she's inviting others too...my uncle and what not. Mostly I'm just excited about the food..ya know it's gonna be good.

Speaking of food I craving a salt bagel from Kettlemans.. those things are so damn good.

it's dust.

I made this book for victortenzin:

Wha is Bravery?

He went and got the Pig Plague shot today and was very brave about it.